Hope all is well with you. I received the Grape flower essence yesterday and started Marvin on it. I noticed immediately that he became even more needy and possessive of both my husband and I. Unfortunately, he has been attacking Sammie more frequently. Mornings and evenings are his worst.
We love him, but I can honestly say we are getting concerned with Sammie at this point. She is the sweetest girl. She would love for him to be friendly with her, which he is, once in a while. I do distract him with toys, but sometimes I cannot intervene fast enough.
I guess we just need encouragement at this point.
Sorry to bother you, Sharon
I’m so sorry to hear how this is going, but the situation makes complete sense if we can understand instinct-driven cat behavior. There are MAJOR changes going on in both their worlds as they learn to co-exist together, with Marvin being territorial (and neutered a little later in his life), and Sammie being a more gentle home-body.
I cannot stress enough your role at this time to help the energy move forward in positive ways. This situation cannot be handled passively. I’m not saying you’re doing that, but there’s a lot of responsibility on the owner(s) to work with both cats. Their focus of energy needs to be redirected away from aggression, meaning for Marvin, with lots of treats and interactive pole toys when they’re together, to ease the tensions. Either they can play together, or one can watch the other playing, which is non-threatening for the watchful cat. When you can’t be there, they need to be kept separate and safe.
It sounds like the flower essence in question has flushed out the issue which, in itself, isn’t a bad thing. It’s important not to let the open hostility become a behavior pattern for your handsome boy.
Again, to reiterate what we talked about, this situation CAN be resolved. Introducing a new cat to an older one is one of the most common and problematic cat issues, and it IS one that can have a very happy ending.There are also cases where the owners just can’t put more time into it. In that case, one cat often has to be rehomed. Let’s not go there yet. There’s GREAT hope for this situation, but it will take energy and vigilance on your part. Marvin is acting instinctively, and according to his own unique personality, history, and expression of himself.
My guess is that it won’t be long until you’re emailing me a photo of the two of them grooming and cuddling up together for an afternoon nap!
Hope this helps, and truly I wish you all the best with great success,
NOTE: As a follow-up, good news is on the horizon, and Marvin has turned a corner. For one thing, after starting on Grape Essence, he began sleeping peacefully on the owners’ bed at night. There are occasional grooming sessions between the 2 cats that are becoming more frequent, with only a few times of regressed behavior for Marvin. It’s looking like the household tensions are, slowly but surely, being replaced by harmonious behaviors.