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Flower Essences for Grief, Loss, and Loving an Impossible, Outrageous Parent

Loss of a loved one is a universal experience. Founder Lila Devi’s latest book, From Bagels to Curry, is a spiritual memoir about the passing of her father and her journey alongside his struggles and triumphs through the last 5 months of his life.

SiNE-Pear Blsm Sngl 1701646Flower essences can be powerful tools to assist the person who is passing as well as loved ones who are left behind. The appearance of grief can be unpredictable, sometimes popping up out of nowhere in its intensity. It may come in waves, from light to crashing. It can sometimes be triggered by unexpected thoughts or memories of the recently departed.

Perhaps you are dealing with the imminent loss of a parent, a child, a pet, for which the grieving process is virtually the same.

Here are some flower essence suggestions to give comfort, insight, and peace as you continue on your own path of perfect well-being. (If you’re coping with the loss of a pet, please visit Flower Essences for Animals). While any of the 20 Spirit-in-Nature Essences can be used in this context, the flower essences below are the ones that our friends and fans have found the most helpful. Please feel free to experiment with other Spirit-in-Nature flower essences that “reach out to you.”

  1. Pear Essence: peacefulness/emergency usage. Most of our problems arise from resisting what simply “is” and cannot be changed or avoided. Pear Essence directly addresses the resistance that puts you in conflict with the natural evolution of events. Pear is for resolution, acceptance, and a sense of well-being that everything already is, and will be, okay–including the behavior of a loved one, often a family member, who is not easy to be around!
  2. Grapes multicoloredGrape Essence: love and devotion. When we lose a loved one, we feel we’ve lost love. Grape Essence helps to untangle that misunderstanding, much like the tendrils of the grape vine wrap themselves around anything within their reach. The vines too give a poetic reminder that love is never lost; it cannot disappear; it simply changes forms. The lessons of this essence are enormous, giving enormous opportunities for growth. Within the flower of even the most difficult relationship can be a seed of pure love.
  3. Coconut Essence: for uplifted spiritual awareness, this flower essence captures the wisdom of Albert Einstein: “No problem can be solved from the same level that created it.” This flower essence helps us to rise above the difficulties in human communications.
  4. 3C.OrFrt1977588Orange Essence: for enthusiasm and hope, 2 qualities necessary to heal from grief and loss. Deep loss carries its own momentum, that life will always be bleak with the absence of the loved one who has passed. When all you see is the darkness of the tunnel, Orange Essence can help you to see the light at the end of it. In “impossible” relationships, Orange can help us to become that light.
  5. Tomato Essence: strength, perseverance, and courage are the qualities we sometimes need to “pick ourselves up by the boot straps” and get on with our lives. This flower essence can help to activate our own will power and blast through our obstacles. It is through these obstacles that we become strong without being tough in our relationships.
  6. SiNE-Corn Veg1131245Corn Essence: for mental vitality and also for new beginnings, this flower essence can help us to re-invent ourselves in our new lives without the presence of the lost loved one. Not easy to do, but this is where Corn can give a fresh burst of energy to help us move forward. Corn can assist us in transmuting old patterns of being.

These are just a few suggestions, more flower essences will be added to this list in the coming months!

Praise for From Bagels to Curry by the author’s brothers (in order of descending age)

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“In this totally insightful book, my sister uncovers the essence of our father’s zest for life and the unwavering strength with which he struggled through to the end of his life here on earth.” – Phillip Zaret, Physician

“Our sister writes with an unprecedented and infectiously inspiring viewpoint about our loving though sometimes chaotic upbringing. With a Jewish-flavored secularism, our father osmotically taught us to make others feel welcome; that life is beautiful; that time is not meant to be wasted; and above all that nothing is more important than family. He had a dancer’s passion for life! This book will take you on just such a dance.” – Jack Zaret, Consultant

“From Bagels to Curry captures the struggles for purpose and meaning in life as my father approached his passing. His challenge in maintaining his dignity when confronted with inevitable death became an amazing legacy handed to the children he loved so much.” – Moshe Dovid Zaret, Rabbi

“From Bagels to Curry is a truly inspirational story of our father’s handling of his impending death from the time of his diagnosis of pancreatic cancer through the end of his days. He lived with an unwavering positive attitude and zest for life. In his deep hazel eyes, the glass was ALWAYS half full. This special outlook on life never wavered from the time of his fatal diagnosis through his last breath. Thanks, Sis, for writing such a wonderful story!” — Thomas C. Zaret, Attorney at Law